The Meeting
by Seriously Yours
Summary: Snape turns to the dark side. He gets what he wants, power, saisfaction and the ability to cause pain. But everything changes when he realises his mistakes. When he sees himself as he really is for the first time. A story of choices, betrayals and truth..
1. Chapter 1

THE MEETING

This was my second meeting, and as I stood in the moonlit graveyard surrounded by the hooded, masked silhouettes of the Dark Lord's followers, a shiver ran up my spine. I had brought two new recruits with me tonight. They stood behind me nervously awaiting their initiation.

As I approached our master, I fell to my knees and bade the recruits to do the same. Then I crawled towards him and kissed the hem of his robes, before rising and taking my place in the shadowy circle. The new recruits, to my relief, followed my example and came to stand beside me. Within minutes, the rest of the Death Eaters had arrived and taken their places in the circle. I noticed there were at least a dozen new recruits among us. The Dark Lord seemed to have noticed too, because he looked pleased.

He started to pace slowly outside the circle of his followers and stopped behind a person, now and again, seeming to glean satisfaction as the unfortunate recipient of his attention trembled in fear. I did not even shiver when he stopped behind me, which made him remain there longer, before starting the initiation ceremony.

"My Death Eaters, I am pleased to see that you are whole and healthy after the string of attacks we have struck against the Muggle population of Britain, but I am even more pleased to see that you have brought more followers to help our cause." And he launched in to a speech explaining the Death Eater ideals and goals. It was the same speech he had given at my own initiation, and only weeks before, and I found myself tuning him out as I remembered the lucky chance which had lead me to the Dark Lord.

It all began in Diagon Alley where I had gone to buy some potions ingredients for the last potion I needed to finish my collection of undetectable poisons. Just as I had come out of the apothecary, I saw Lucius Malfoy, Head Boy and fellow Slytherin, going towards Flourish & Blotts. I strode towards him, calling out his name.

"Severus, what a surprise!

He looked well, as he should. I had read in the Daily Prophet about his appointment to the Ministry and his recent marriage to the lovely Narcissa Black, who I also remembered from school. Malfoy was certainly on the road to success.

"So how is Narcissa?" I enquired politely, despite the fact that I hadn't been invited to the wedding. Even if I was offended, one didn't go around insulting Malfoys.

"Well enough, but how are you, Snape?" said Lucius.

"Ah, the usual. My Potions work keeps my busy."

"Snape, you should come to dinner tonight at the manor. Narcissa would like to meet you."

The invitation caught me by surprise, but I quickly decided that cultivating the wealthy, pure-blood Malfoys was more important than completing my potion immediately, and accepted his offer.

That night after dinner, Lucius took me aside. "Do you know anything about the attacks on Muggles that have been occurring these last few weeks?"

"An outburst of anti-Muggle sediment, apparently. The same symbol was left in the sky above each of the houses that were destroyed."

"Do you believe what these people are doing is correct?"

"What they are doing is what almost every wizard wants to do."

"Would you like to get back at those Gryffindors who gave you hell at Hogwarts?"

"How can I do that?"

"By joining these people who are killing the Muggles."

I raised my eyebrows skeptically. "How would that help? They don't kill wizards, do they?"

"No, but you can learn ways to get back at them. Things they didn't teach a Hogwarts." He paused. "Dark Magic. Interested?"

"Certainly, but I don't know how to contact them."

Lucius smiled and said, "I know some people. Just meet me here tomorrow at eight o'clock."

So that was how I was introduced to the group that calls themselves the Death Eaters. The next day, after listening to the initiation speech given by the Dark Lord, I was made to stand in front of him and give my oath of allegiance.

"Do you, Severus of the house of Snape, swear to continually serve until your death? Do you swear to utter no words about this cult or its inner working, even under threat of torture and death?"

"Yes, I do."

"Then you must accept my mark to ensure your loyalty and undying devotion. Will you accept it?"

"Yes."

Then they made me read quotes such as _Odeint dum meutant!_ -- Let them hate so long as they fear!

_"Impedio oblitteranda est"_ -- Obstacles are to be eliminated.

"Thou shall not get caught."

Then they branded the Dark Mark on my left forearm. The mark was a skull with a snake protruding from its mouth.

The Dark Lord had finished his initiation speech and was looking around at his Death Eaters who were watching him intently, hanging on his every word. The Dark Lord smiled and called to the new recruits to come forward so that they can be brought into the fold of his followers. After branding one of the new recruits himself, the Dark Lord stepped towards me, leaving the work to Lucius Malfoy.

"Severus, take a walk with me."

The request was so unexpected that I was it took a couple stunned seconds before I could reply, "Yes, Master." I followed him, keeping a respectful half a step behind.

"What is our next target like, Severus? I presume that the Mudbloods are not powerful enough to beat back a group of Death Eaters?"

I knew what the Dark Lord was talking about; the last mission had been a complete failure. At least three Mudblood witches had slipped away under our very noses. Luckily, I had not yet joined the Death Eaters at the time, so I had not suffered the Dark Lord's fury.

"There may be complications, Master. There's always that risk," I said. "But they will not be able to escape the attack," I added quickly, seeing the Dark Lord's face darken.

"Very well, Severus, I will put you in charge of the mission. I expect you to deal with any…complications. Know that I will _not_ accept failure."

I could see that he was not happy with me. That I had escaped unscathed was a miracle. The Dark Lord walked away, towards his pet snake, Nagini, and I made my way towards Lucius, who had given the job to Avery. "What did he want?" Lucius asked.

"Oh, nothing, just a pleasant reminder to me about that last little failure and a not so subtle threat about what will happen if it occurs again." Lucius was looking at the floor. It had been he who had carelessly let the Mudbloods slip past him unnoticed, though he would never admit it.

After a boring half-hour watching the new recruits scream as the Dark Mark was branded into their flesh, the Dark Lord finally dismissed us with a final admonition.

"I expect the Dark Mark to be hovering over that Mudblood's house and all its occupants dead. I will not accept failure this time, for this will be the last mission without resistance you will be assigned. If you fail, you will be punished severely. This mission is the second step towards our goal, so I am sure the Ministry actively try to thwart us. Be on your guard."

With that, the Dark Lord turned and Disapparated. I gave Lucius a courteous nod and Apparated to my flat. As I got into bed, I thought about all the difficulties we might face if the Mudbloods decided to fight back. With the weight of the mission resting uneasily on my shoulders, I drifted off to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

THE MISSION

The next day blossomed in a very different way from the usual alarm clock wakening. The first thing I saw the moment I woke up was a jet-black owl tapping at my window. I got up to let it in, and to my surprise, the owl was not carrying a letter. Curious, I stepped forward with my wand raised, eyeing the bird warily. It was staring at me in a strangely determined manner. I took a cautious step forward, and was about to touch it when, with a loud bang and a puff of black smoke, the owl changed into a house-elf. I jumped back and barely managed to bite back the curse that instinctively flew to my lips.

What the hell do you­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ think —" I snarled.

"I is sorry, master Snape. Master Transfigured Dobby because Dobby over pressed his robes," explained the elf. I is here because master Malfoy wants Dobby to tell master Snape, 'When are we going to do it?'"

"Tonight. Tell your master to meet me tonight at nine near the Muggle antique shop on High Street," I snarled. I had had enough of the scared house-elf, so I Transfigured it into a falcon and threw it back out the window. As I was now fully alert after such an unexpected awakening, I decided to eat breakfast before meeting the new recruits to tell them about tonight's plan. I took out the plan of the area in which the Muggles lived, and was going over it for the umpteenth time, over a cup of black coffee, when a loud banging jolted me out of my seat.

"Magical Law Enforcement. Open up!"

No one except Lucius knew where I lived, so I panicked. Wiping the piece of parchment clean, I blasted the door down and directed my wand at the charred doorway. "_Serpensortia!" _A black snake appeared on the threshold before the robed figures. I pointed at it and shouted, "_Engorgio!" _Without stopping to admire the impromptu door warden, I fled the room.

Since I joined the Death Eaters last year, I had begun looking over my shoulder constantly. Sometimes I worried I was getting too paranoid, but now it seemed to have paid off. As I made my way to my room, I flicked my wand, and all my belongings leapt into my trunk. I quickly reduced the trunk, put it in my pocket, and Apparated to my father's flat in Muggle London. Just before I Disapparated though, I heard Aurors breaking into the house past the snake.

The first thing I did when I arrived was fire call Lucius, explaining what had happened, and asking him to meet me right away. As I waited for him to arrive, I pondered how the Aurors could have discovered my whereabouts. I could not fathom how they got past my wards without setting them off, or at least alerting me. I was not on the Ministry's wanted list of known Death Eaters; in fact, I did not even believe that they suspected me. Who would suspect a half-blood? Had I been a fool to react as I did? Perhaps it had been just a routine Ministry enquiry. No, that knock had meant business. The only explanation I could come up with was that there was a traitor amongst the Death Eaters. I was just beginning to consider the consequences of being wanted by the Ministry, when Lucius arrived looking shaken.

"Who the hell betrayed you?" he shouted, not waiting for me to say something.

"One of the new recruits, I think, though I can't guess how he knew where I lived, or how he got past my wards unnoticed. Not even the most powerful Aurors could have managed such a feat."

Lucius was worried; I could see it in his face. There was no telling what other names the traitor had given the Ministry. If Lucius had been betrayed, he was better off than I, with the wealth and power of the Malfoys behind him, but there _was_ a limit to the protection such things would give him in these paranoid times. "I can assure you," he said, "none of the ones I brought knew of your whereabouts."

That made the list of suspects very short, as I certainly had not told any of _my_ recruits where I lived…unless someone had followed me. But that was impossible. I'd always Apparated to the house, and that was untraceable. I spent the rest of the morning proposing and discarding possible traitors with Lucius, to no avail. We agreed that despite this complication, the plan would continue as normal.

It was only after he left that I really looked around at the place I hated so much — the disgustingly Muggle place where I was born, where I was abused, and to which I had hoped never return. I had vowed that I would never step into this house again under any circumstance…but here I was.

I got up from my chair and started to unpack my trunk. I hoped that this mission, this last uninterrupted missionwould be a success, and the Mudbloods would not put up too much of a fight. I hoped that this mission, if it were successful, would be my ticket into the Dark Lord's inner circle. I was new, and a half-blood, so I knew gaining the Dark Lord's trust would take time, but I hadn't taken the Dark Mark to serve as a lowly flunky. I wanted to rise to the top. I wanted be feared. I wanted power.

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

I Apparated near the antique shop, and was pleased to see that the others had already arrived before me. The six of them stood dressed for action in black masks and deep-hooded cloaks. I signaled them to follow, and quietly made my way to the Mudbloods' house, which we were to destroy. The street was empty and the house, dark. As we carefully made our way through the front garden, our footsteps against the leaves and grass sounded unnaturally loud. Then, to my horror, there was a loud crack followed by a muffled shout. One of the new recruits had stepped on a branch and tripped. I quickly put a Disillusion Charm on myself so that the Muggles would not see me if they looked out of their window; I heard the others do the same. After a tense moment, the house remained dark and silent, so I mounted the stairs to the front porch.

I pointed my wand at the door and thought, _Alohomora. _The door opened soundlessly to reveal a teen, her eyes wide with surprise. The moment she saw me, she fumbled for her wand, but the Stunning Spell had already hit her squarely in the face and she tumbled forward.

The other Death Eaters and I quickly entered the house and set to work. I gave the teenage girl to Avery and Nott. The new recruits went in search of anyone else who might happen be in the house. I joined Lucius in the master bedroom where he had already started on the Mudblood mother and Muggle father. I turned towards the mother of the teen and shouted, "_Crucio!" _She screamed, but nobody would hear her as I had already put up a Silencing Charm around the house. I held the curse until she snapped into unconsciousness. It was disappointing to see her break so quickly, so I pointed my wand at her again. "_Enervate!" _She woke up as artificial energy poured through her body. Again, I started torturing her. _These Muggles-lovers are so helpless,_ I thought with contempt, _in the face of true magic…in the face of my power._ It was intoxicating. Finally, about ten minutes later, after the woman had fallen into unconsciousness for the third time, I directed my wand at her and said, "_Avada Kedarva!" _The green light that filled the room was blinding, but the woman stopped screaming and twitching the moment the green light hit her in the chest

I looked around to see Lucius watching, enraptured. When I meet his eyes, he smirked. "You kill them too early, my friend. Let me show you the finer points of Muggle torture."

"As if you could teach me anything," I sneered. "And it's too risky to linger much longer."

Lucius only nodded. He slashed his wand through the air. The Muggle screamed, and a series of cracking noises rent the air, bones breaking. Then he slashed again shouting, "_Epicurimomento!" _and a series of deep cuts appeared on the Muggle's chest. One couldn't help but admire his technique, technique learned from the Dark Lord himself. The curse had not done the worst possible damage, though. _I could have done better,_ I thought. _I'm better at Dark Arts than most of the inner circle, even the ever so pure-blooded Lucius, and the Dark Lord will soon see it._ Lucius looked up and smiled at me, then moved on to the Cruciatus Curse, which, when finished, left the Muggle almost dead. Once more Lucius flicked his wand. "_Conflagrate!_" A purple flame, which I could smell burning the insides of the Muggle, shot out of the end. Just as Lucius was going to put another curse on the Muggle, Nott called from downstairs. "Snape, we have a problem here!"

I exchanged a look of fear and frustration with Lucius, who quickly dispatched the Muggle. We rushed downstairs. I commanded the new recruits, who were just idling on the couch (having found no work), to Dissaparate and followed Lucius out the door. Weran outside to see a blond boy running full pelt towards the neighboring house. Nott and Avery were already giving chase, but none of their curses made contact. I was a step ahead of Lucius, and used it to my advantage. I pointed my wand at the running boy and shouted, _"Incendi Imensius!" _The result was instantaneous. The boy burst into a giant fireball, sending off a heat wave that knocked both Avery and Nott off their feet. Disaster averted, I turned towards the house, pointed my wand at the door and shouted "_Annihilatans!"_ The whole building collapsed on itself. I pointed my wand at the sky and shouted for the whole neighborhood to hear, "_MORSEMORDE!"_

The Dark Mark slithered out of my wand and hovered over the house, bathing the whole yard in a green light. Just as I turned to smirk triumphantly at Lucius, I saw a shadow hurrying towards the street. "There's another one!" I shouted, and took off after the figure. It was a girl. Just as I was about to cast the Killing Curse, several things happened. First, the girl put out her left hand and jumped onto a triple decker bus that just appeared out of nowhere. Secondly, a six-man Auror team Apparated ten feet from where Lucius and I were standing. We immediately jumped for cover behind a Muggle car as Avery and Nott did the same behind a dumpster.I slid my shaking wand out from behind the Muggle car and thought, "_Avada Kedarva! Evabero! Sectusempra! Crucio! Incendi! Imensius!" _Even though I knew I wasn't hitting anything, at least the Aurors would be distracted by the flurry of curses.

Lucius was staring at me questioningly, so I signaled to him and he nodded. The Aurors were firing spells at us at a rapid rate, as if they were desperate, but our car held. On my mark we both left our cover and attacked. "_Stumpefy! Incendio! Sectusempra! Inferio! Rockevotus! Impedimenta!" _The Aurors immediately fell down, seriously injured or stunned, all except one, who I thought I recognized — James Potter. I signaled to the others and, without hesitation, the Death Eaters Disapparated. I pointed my wand at the Auror. "_Dextrus negatum!" _A large blue light left my wand and hit the Auror, whose arms went instantly limp. I turned around just as I heard a loud _pop_ from somewhere behind me and, without waiting to investigate, I Dissaparated.

I arrived at the graveyard out of breath and very weak (wordless magic takes more power from the user). When I looked up I saw, to my surprise, that all the Death Eaters were present to witness the report we had to give. I cursed inwardly as I saw the Dark Lord waiting in the middle of the circle, his continence stormy. I fell to my knees and kissed the hem of his robes shakily.

"How did the mission go, Severus? Did you succeed?" I could tell that he was mocking me, but I knew we had succeeded, so I confidently started to tell him everything. The moment I came to the part where the Aurors interfered, I remembered the girl who had escaped; a small mistake, and not my fault, but I knew I was going to pay for it.

"Did you say, Severus, that the Aurors knew of the attack before you left?" the cold voice snarled. I wanted to say _obviously, with the Dark Mark blazing in the sky, the Aurors were going to find out about the attack eventually,_ but I refrained.

"Did you say, Severus, that you failed to eliminate the entire family, that you let a witness escape?"

"Yes, master," I said, fully expecting to die for this failure. I grasped for the only excuse that might sway the Dark Lord. "We were betrayed. Someone sent Aurors after me this morning, and I believe he may have warned the Aurors of tonight's attack."

The Dark Lord scanned the faces of his followers, as if he could identify the traitor on sight and, for a moment, I hoped that his wrath had been successfully diverted. Then his glittering eyes met mine once more.

"Yet you carried on with the plan."

I remained silent.

"Yet you lingered, sporting with the Mudbloods, giving the Aurors time to arrive. And now you have the audacity show up here and admit your failure?"

"Yes…no, master." I gave Lucius a death glare. I was truly going to die now.

"You have failed, Severus. I am disappointed, and for that you will pay." I could not believe it. I was the only one taking the blame?

"_Crucio!"_

I screamed in spite of myself. I screamed as I had never done before, and it felt as if all my nerve endings were trying to tear out of my body in their agony. Suddenly, the Dark Lord lowered his wand and the pain stopped, but I continued to twitch. _Why had I been singled out for punishment, while Lucius, the Dark Lord's pure-blood favorite, was spared even a reprimand, _I thought as I lay on the dead grass.

Instead of the Killing Curse I expected, the cold voice said, "Let that be a lesson to you all. I will not, from this moment forward, accept failure as an option or incompetence as an excuse." Then he was gone.

I got up shakily and Apparated to my father's flat. I thought of the Mudblood woman, writing under my Cruciatus Curse, earlier that evening. I now knew the feeling of being on the receiving end of such torture. Shakily I got onto my bed and thought about the day, which had been red-letter, even for me — I'd been betrayed, forced to return to my childhood home, tortured a Muggle family, been attacked by Aurors and Crucio'd by the Dark Lord. I considered again the unknown person who had betrayed me, as I fell into an uncomfortable dream in which I had succeeded, and the Dark Lord had accepted me into his inner fold.


	3. Chapter 3

**THE HEADGIRL  
**

When I woke up the next morning the first thing that came to mind was what happened yesterday. My body ached with the after effects of the Cruciatus Curse. I wearily got out of bed and got into my normal black robes, and then I sat down in front of my potions table and checked if I had all the ingredients to make an antidote for the Cruciatus Curse. To my amazement I found out that I was lacking some orange snail shells, which meant that I needed to go to Diagon Alley again. Just as I was ready to Disapparate, Lucius's face appeared in the fire, which (even though I was used to it) still made me jump. I turned towards the fire and shouted, "What?"

"I just decided to call you to see if you were…" drawled Lucius.

"I'm ok! So please go. I'm a very busy person!" I snarled.

"Ok, ok! There's a meeting tomorrow at…" I never heard the rest of the sentence as I had already Apparated to Diagon Alley and started strolling towards the apocathery. This was supposed to be a quick errand, but to my surprise, I saw a person whom I had not even thought of meeting after I joined the Death Eaters: Lily Evans. Former Prefect, Former Head Girl. From what I gathered, she left Hogwarts with six NEWTS, and two years later got married to that despicable Potter and secured her position as an Unspeakable in the Department of Mysteries. Married to Potter. What a total waste of a life.

Suppressing my resentment, I walked up to her. My thoughts were in turmoil; I should talk to her, provoke her, taunt her for being a filthy Muggle. I was, after all, a Death Eater; that was what was expected of me. Another part of me just wanted to walk away, away from potential Potter induced violence. Merlin knows I did not need any more bad memories. Yet deep inside, a part of me wanted to talk to her as I had done in our school years, during the few precious moments when that dog Potter wasn't tailing her. I wanted to converse, without insults, without hurt, an amiable, intelligent conversation between two friends. Were we ever friends?

Without thinking, I walked over to her. She was standing with her back to me, examining a mannequin in a window.

"Evans? Or should I say Potter?"

She whirled around, green eyes snapping to mine and gazing into my very soul. I never liked her eyes. In truth, they were worse than Dumbledore's, penetrating my very core, my soul…my secrets.

"Severus?"

"Memory loss?" I couldn't help myself. I guess it didn't take Potter and Black to bring out my worst.

Eyes flashed. Green. "No, unfortunately."

This had been was a mistake. Just two words. Two were all I needed to turn a friend into an enemy. What amazing talent. This was not going how I imagined it would. What was I doing? What was I hoping for? Why did I even care?

"Is being an Unspeakable a stepping stone to being unapproachable?" I forced my voice into something approaching pleasant. I cannot, and will not, ever achieve the full effect.

"Yes…I mean no… How? How did you know?"

"See this rounded thing, Evans? There are two, one on each side of my head. They're called ears. Their function, I believe, is to listen and to hear."

There we were again. The stare was on. Full power. She seemed to be battling with herself. I took a step backwards, conscious of all the practice she had at slapping. Potter made good practice.

"Oh, Severus." Evans was smiling. Smiling? However, there was something else in her eyes that made my hackles rise. Pity.

It took all my self-control not to lash out at her. Not to heap insult upon insult on her. I, Severus Snape, cold-hearted torturer, ruthless killer, pitied by a Mudblood?

"Yes, I am Severus, you are Evans…I thought we already established that. Can we proceed?" I remarked coldly, not comprehending why I was still standing here continuing a conversation that wasn't going anywhere.

"Where have you been, Severus? It's been years since I last saw you. You didn't even tell Horace your plans! You didn't even come to his last party!

"I didn't know you cared, Evans." I raised my eyebrow, genuinely surprised.

"Please, Severus, can you drop the high act already? There's nobody here to hear your insults except me. So no more sarcasm, ok? Unless you mean it."

_What makes you so sure I don't?_ I nearly said, but something stopped me. Lily's figure. She had always been a slim, shapely woman. Therefore, it did not take the eyes of an eagle to distinguish the slight bulge in her abdomen that was independent of obesity.

"…something preoccupying you other than a new potion? Hmm…? C'mon you can tell me. Have you met a girl?" I didn't reply. She was pregnant. Pregnant by Potter. It had been just two years since we left school; two years that I had wasted among steaming cauldrons and noxious fumes. Two years I had spent worshipping the Dark Lord, governing my every move to gain his approval. Two years trying to find acceptance. What was she thinking? Lily Evans was not the type of woman to sit around nursing a baby and warming her husband's dinner, but now that's exactly what she'd end up being. Just another wife. The trophy wife of James Potter.

"Are you serious, Lily?" No girl in her right mind would fall for him! No girl other than some poor chick who'd accidentally drunk one of his love potions.

"Is that why you've disappeared lately, Snape? Busy making _L'amour de Snivellus_?"

Bloody Potter had arrived at the scene. I took my time turning to face him. No point in spinning like a top and giving away how nervous I really was. _It's funny how even after all of these years apart all my hatred and all my loathing can fire up at just one word from him. I'm sure that no matter what universe we are in, no matter if we're wheezing old men or babies in diapers, Potter will always hate me and I, him._

"James, stop it. You will NOT revive a stupid high school grudge. Not after all these years. I will not…"

"C'mon, Lils, I don't know how you can stand talking to him. Especially knowing what crowd he's hanging around with. Tell me, Snape, if you haven't been making love potions, what exactly have you been doing?"

"I don't think that's any of your business, Potter. But I believe that using love potions to get a girl to like you is better than getting her pregnant and forcing her to marry you." I didn't look at Lily, but I could imagine the look of anger and hurt on her face. It served her right, I told myself. Throwing away all her potential just to bring up a monster with Potter's genes?But in my heart I knew that it wasn't Lily's wasted potential that made me so angry.

In a flash Potter's wand was out and aimed at my heart. Mine was not. I was no fool. We were in the middle of Diagon Alley in broad daylight. I knew that no matter how badly he wanted to curse me, he would not do so; he loved being an Auror too much to risk losing his post.

"You take that back, you slimy piece of shit," Potter's voice shook with raw, barely suppressed emotion.

Change of speakernew paragraph "Truth hurts doesn't it, Potter?" His face darkened and he stepped forward until he was mere inches from me.

"James! No! Let's just go," Lily cried, but Potter wasn't finished.

"The truth, Snape, is that one day I'll prove to the whole world what foul scum you are. I'll have the pleasure of dragging you to Azkaban, and before I hand you to the Dementors, I'll make sure that you pay for this day, you'll pay with your…"

"What'll he pay you with, James? Please don't say he'll hand over his underpants, because, Prongs, old pal, I don't think you'll survive another encounter with Snivellus's knickers."

_Shit! Black. This cannot be happening._ I felt cornered and smothered even though we were in the middle of a wide, windy street. I twisted aside and took two paces back in order to face them both. "Well, well, well, the mutt is here. Where's the werewolf and the worm? Are you sure you can handle me without them, Potter?"

"Don't worry, Snape, Remus and Peter send their regards and they're sorry not to be here. But, hey, I'm not complaining; it leaves more for us." Black took out his wand and started twirling it. I was no longer safe. Potter may bow to the law, but Black was another story entirely. If he had a chance to curse me, he would; job, law and God be damned. I knew him, and I also knew that a fight was out of the question. The Dark Lord would flay me alive for drawing attention to myself. My conversation with Lily Evans was over.

Recognizing defeat, I turned on the spot and walked away with Black's derisive taunts ringing in my ears. "Yeah, that's right, Snivellus, run like a coward. Run back to whatever greasy hole you came from. Do us a favor and stay there."

I was impervious to the insults. But anger was enveloping me with every step I took. Anger at my helplessness. Anger at Potter. Anger at her.

In a couple of months Lily would give birth to a monster. A demon that would mirror James Potter in every way. Looks, Arrogance, Cruelty…Talent. Unconsciously, I started wondering what Lily would name her child, whether any of her fiery personality would be passed on. Will the child inherit her spicy sense of humor, her unwavering sense of justice?

As I Dissaparated empty handed, I wondered if the child were a boy or a girl.


	4. Chapter 4

THE INFORMER

The moment I Apparated back in my father's house, I mentally slapped myself for my rash words to Evans – or, rather, to Potter. I was surprised that I had made it out without any curses being thrown; when the infamous Potter and Black were together, they weren't known for their restraint. If it had come to that, I would have had their heads on a silver stake with Dark Magic.

I spent a few minutes dreaming about winning a long duel with that bastard, Black. As I was thinking about sticking Black's and Potter's heads on a silver stake, I remembered another Marauder, who had almost killed me--Remus Lupin. The werewolf had given me a horrible time too. Thinking about the horrible life I had had in Hogwarts brought back memories of my childhood. The way that I had suffered at the hands of my father had at least taught me how to survive being tormented by the Marauders.

My mother Eileen Prince was a pureblood witch who had gone to Hogwarts. She had fallen in love with a Muggle called Tobias Snape and married him without revealing her Magic heritage. After thirteen years of marriage, my mother thought it safe to confide in her husband; she told him the truth. Though my father did not leave his wife and his seven-year-old son, he started to torture us every single day. What began as taunts and insults soon became physical blows, and my mother did not do anything to stop him. She loved him too much.

The day I received my Hogwarts letter, my father left us for good, and I left home knowing that my mother was dying. I had no way of knowing that school life would not be much different than home. After I came home, I found out that mother had died three days earlier. There was nothing I could do but weep. That was the first time I had cried, the first time I had shown weakness. I had learned quite a lot from the books in the Hogwarts library. I had learned a great deal about Potions, and I had found that I was quite good at it. I swore revenge on my father and, in my second year, I committed murder. After my father's death, I named myself "The Half-Blood Prince" but did not tell any of my friends about it. **(He didn't tell his friends about the nickname, or the murder?)**

Memories of my past flew through my mind and brought with them a jumble of emotions. I hated myself for going to Hogwarts. Part of me wanted to kill everyone I knew. Part of me wanted to kill myself. I got up slowly and started to walk around the room, trying desperately to forget. I paused before the fireplace, and abruptly remembered Lucius mentioning a meeting today. Cursing, I grabbed my cloak and mask, hoping against hope that I wasn't late.

"Ah, I see that Severus has decided to join us. You're late. I do not tolerate lateness. _Crucio"_.

I screamed, even though I was prepared for this very situation, and kept screaming until, finally, the Dark Lord lifted the curse. I rolled on to my knees, kissed the Dark Lord's robes with hatred and took my place. I knew I was getting Crucio'd too many times, but _it was not my fault!_ I looked at Lucius and was not surprised to see that he was sneering. But before I could make a comment, a clocked figure stepped forward said in a low, cool voice said, "My lord, shall I give my report?"

"Yes."

"Thank you, Master. I have gathered a lot of information about quite a number of the trainee Aurors and their mentors. There is talk about James Potter, who is being taught by the legendary 'Mad Eye' Moody. He is exceptional, master. He fights the Imperius Curse off like it's nothing. His curses and his reflexes are the best I have ever seen. He can fight like Alastor Moody himself, and he can learn new spells so fast, it's as if he knew them already. But Master, he is not the only one. A certain Sirius Black, who happens to be his best friend, is also fast gaining a reputation as a formidable and brilliant trainee. But he, unlike Potter, is not above using Dark Magic against his enemies. I intend to monitor these two closely.

"Well done, Rookwood. Your information is unfaultable. Your narration, however, leaves something to be desired. You praise the young Aurors entirely too much. Are you a spy or a secret admirer?" At this, a ripple of laughter ran through the Death Eater ranks, and Voldemort allowed himself a small smile.

"On to the matter at hand: Potter and Black, our rising stars. Regulus, it's a pity your brother has chosen the losing side. How I hate to see talent and power wasted. Your attempts to convert him to our cause have been futile, I believe?"

I looked to my right as the tall, slender figure of Regulus Black stepped forward. "Yes, Master, but if you give me more time, I believe that he will join our side. I have sent many letters to the werewolf, but he refused, for which he has paid. Now, I reckon, he is reconsidering. I believe that if he turns, my blood traitor brother may join us too. Gryffindors have a tendency to follow suit.

"Very well, Regulus. I want him on our side, if possible, but on no account is the Ministry to have him. If he does not turn, you will kill him. Is that clear?" The Dark Lord looked around, gave me a look that said 'follow me' and walked out of the circle hissing, "Dismissed". As my colleagues Disapparated, I followed Voldemort, all my nerves on edge as I didn't have a clue what the Dark Lord might do.

"Severus, I see that you can't complete a proper mission, so I am going to appoint you to a 'desk position,' as the Muggles put it".

"Master, I do not understand." I had no idea what the Dark Lord meant.

"Don't you, Severus?" Voldemort sneered. "Well, I'll put it into simpler words. You will no be participating in future missions. Instead, I want you to find more about this James Potter and Sirius Black. I do not trust Regulus with his brother.

"Thank you. Master, you are too kind," was all I could manage to say. But the Dark Lord was not finished with me.

"I also want you to create some potions for me, which will earn you a higher standing in my eyes _if _you succeed".

"What are the potions, my lord?"

"The Draught of Darkness and the Memory Enhancer Potion. I want them by next month."

"Yes, Master, I will not disappoint you," I gulped.

I Disapparated to my Muggle house in Spinner's end to start on the potions straight away. Several of the ingredients would very hard to find legally in Diagon Alley and I was reluctant to risk as trip to Knockturn Alley, if I could help it. I searched around my mother's room and was surprised to find quite a lot of potions ingredients, some of which were exactly what I needed.

Seven hours later, I stirred the potion clockwise seven times and left it to settle. Now the cauldron was the perfect shade of dark green with silver streaks. I left the cauldron in its place as the Memory Enhancer takes three days to settle and then must be taken on a full moon. I lay down on my bed and started to drift off. I dreamt that I was standing behind Lily in Diagon Alley while an ugly Potter stood in front of us with a sneer quite like the one I usually wore on my face. The odd thing was, I was defending Lily, and Potter was the one who was making the snide comments. I watched as I stepped forward with my wand drawn, but before I could tear that sneer off Potter's face, Lily stepped forward and stopped me just as Potter said— I never found out what Potter really said, as I woke up with a start. My Dark Mark was burning. I thought, _what the hel_l?_ He's calling us already? _I looked up at the clock to find to my shock that two whole hours had passed during my seemingly short dream. I got up, put on my Death Eater robes and Dissaparated to the graveyard yet again.

When I took my place, I could see that all the Death Eaters were present and that, just like me, everyone was curious to know why the Dark Lord had called us so soon. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Voldemort appeared in the middle of the circle of Death Eaters. He took no time to explain the reason for this meeting but got immediately to business.

"My loyal Death Eaters, I have found a very good lead, a lead which will allow us to capture some very important Aurors and extract valuable information from them. A certain spy has told me that the Aurors are going to a place called Hidden Grove in order to train the new recruits." Voldemort gave Regulus and me a very sharp look and continued. "They will not take the direct route. In order to show trainees a perfect spot to duel, they will go to the Drakken Forest in Scotland, which also happens to be a perfect spot for an ambush."

Lucius stepped forward and said, "But Master, surely we don't know how many Aurors will be there?"

Voldemort smiled, which I thought was very bad, as he rarely smiled. I was wrong; he seemed to be in a good mood because he said, "Ah…Lucius, you have forgotten our spy. He told me the exact number of people who will come to the forest and how many will follow them to Hidden Grove." Suddenly he became serious and said, "I want all of you to go to Drakken Forest at eleven thirty today and capture as many Aurors as you can, but don't get caught, as I will not save you. If you find that there are too many Aurors, get out with the people you have captured. On this mission of vital importance, I will come with you." The Dark Lord waved his hand in a gesture of dismissal and Dissaparated. I waited for the others to leave before walking to Lucius and saying "If we fail, which is very likely, we are all going to die."

"Ah now, don't be so pessimistic, Snape!" Lucius drawled.

"I bet three Galleons that we will fail this mission."

"You're on!"

"Let's get ready, Lucius."


	5. Chapter 5

The Dog Star

I Apparated to Drakken Forest in northern Scotland. I was surprised to find myself so quickly back in the field after the Dark Lord's words earlier. However, as the Dark Lord deemed this mission vital enough to lead himself, he must have felt it required all hands on deck.

The area before me was beautiful -- nature at its best. Autumn was at its peak in Scotland with the forest draped in fiery orange and deep scarlet. However, I was not allowed to linger.

"Come on, Snape!"

I had no choice but to follow my fellow Death Eaters who, apparently, had no appreciation for nature. I followed them reluctantly, snapping at anyone and everyone in my path. The moment we reached our rendezvous point, the perfect place for an ambush, Voldemort's voice called to us, "The Aurors are approaching! Get ready!"

I put a Disillusionment Charm on myself and hid behind a large oak tree, while the others either levitated themselves onto high branches or hid behind bushes. We all waited in complete silence broken only by the slight drizzle pattering on the leaves. Even the animals respected the tense silence. I strained my ears and heard the unmistakable_ pops _of at least twenty Aurors Apparating into the clearing.

A voice blasted into the silence. "Is everyone here? Ok people, this is the place where we hold the weekly mentor–student duels. I brought you here so that no one will have to accompany you when you reach this point in your training. Ok! Get ready —"

I felt my mark burn — the signal. I stepped out from behind the oak tree, calling up all the nonverbal spells I had ever learned, just as a familiar voice shouted, "Look out! It's an ambush!" I was not surprised. Sirius Black was the only idiot who _always_ stated the obvious.

The Aurors started throwing defensive spells and curses as the other Death Eaters materialized out of nowhere and joined the battle. The forest had become a battleground in a matter of seconds. Aurors and Death Eaters were falling almost at the same rate, stunned, dead or bound.

I was battling two Aurors at once, Dorcas Meadows and Heistia Jones. I sent a strangling curse in Meadows's direction and shoved a _Levicorpus_ at Jones. Meadows was struggling with the curse, so I Stunned her, bound her, and removed the strangling curse. I turned to Jones, expecting her to be still hanging but, to my surprise she was already on her feet, having found the counter-curse. The girl was good! I threw curse upon curse at her, but she kept on blocking. She managed to push a powerful bone-breaking curse at me. It hit me full-force on the chest, and I was thrown backwards, but not before I whipped my wand around, casting my favorite spell. _"SECTUMSEMPRA!" _It cut deep gashes across her chest and arms.

I fell down, wheezing, near the edge of the clearing where, thankfully, no one was fighting. I felt my chest and was not surprised to find that almost all of my ribs were broken. I could hardly breathe. While performing certain dark Healing spells, I also cast a Disillusionment Charm around myself, just in case. I licked my lips, tasting blood, and looked up to see how Jones was doing. She was no longer alone. James Potter stood over her, performing a counter-curse, which seemed to be working. After he was done, he gave her over to another Auror who Dissaparated the moment he took Jones into his arms.

I watched as Potter turned towards another Death Eater who was fighting Black, and disarmed him. Black shouted out a curse that uprooted a seventeen foot tree and hit the Death Eater with such force that he was thrown thirty feet into the air before landing on the ground with a sickening splat. Potter and Black exchanged high fives and looked around for more Death Eaters. As I was in no position to fight both of them, I did the only thing that came to my mind — I played dead.

When I opened my eyes two minutes later, I saw Potter and Black working together to capture two Death Eaters at once. Within seconds they had them bound and unconscious. I watched Black turn to duel another Death Eater, and blinked in disbelief as I saw a stream of green light shoot out of Black's wand and hit one of the new recruits squarely in the chest, sending him flying straight into a tree, completely and utterly dead. I could not believe what I had just seen — Black had just killed! No Auror could kill unless it was absolutely necessary (Black had been already winning), but then when had Black _ever_ played by the rules?

A person, who had just walked past me, obstructed my view of Black and Potter for a moment. My eyes bulged out the moment I saw who the figure was — Lord Voldemort. I watched in fascination as the Dark Lord cut a path straight towards Black and Potter, who were still hadn't seen him, cursing anyone and everyone who stood in his path, Death Eaters and Aurors alike. Just as the Dark Lord stopped a few feet in front of Black and Potter, they turned their wands in unison straight at Voldemort's heart. The clearing got very quiet and everything that was happening around me blurred as I focused all my attention on the three people in the middle of the battlefield. I watched wide eyed as the Dark Lord and the two Marauders confronted each other eye-to-eye. For almost five minutes, Black and Potter struggled to fight the Dark Lord's Legilimency. It seemed as if they had won because the Dark Lord broke the silence. "I have heard a lot about you, Mr. Black and Mr. Potter. I have been watching you for some time now, and I am most convinced that your abilities are exceptional. I have to say, though, that such abilities would be better rewarded if put to the right use. Under my guidance, you would learn much more. You would gain power, power beyond your imagination. Only by joining me, will you achieve your fullest potential." Voldemort smiled, having clearly captured Potter's attention.

"Who are you? And what do you know about my abilities?"

"I am Lord Voldemort, the leader of the Death Eaters, and I am offering you the chance to join my army."

"Join you! The bastard fulfilling what that Slytherin started, killing all the Muggleborns? Don't make me laugh!"

Red eyes flashed, but Voldemort remained calm.

"You refuse? I expect better from you, Black."

"Sorry, Moldy. Thanks, but no thanks," said Black.

"Then I have no further need for you two. "_Avada Kedarva!_" Voldemort shouted.

Potter jumped aside, avoiding the Killing Curse and, swishing his wand left and right, pointed it at Voldemort. A bluish-black light streaked out of Potter's wand and hit the orange light of Voldemort's next curse. The result was instantaneous: an explosion that carved a deep crater in the forest floor and reduced the nearby trees to ashes. I was surprised. Potter had certainly learned a lot under Alaster Moody.

Black, on the other hand, had rolled off to one side and come up in a sort of crouch. He had his left arm extended with his palm held open and his right arm drawn back with his wand in hand. The crouching position allowed him to move around the clearing, raining spell upon spell at the Dark Lord from all sides, while Potter dodged and sent an occasional curse in the direction of Lord Voldemort. What I noticed was, while Potter utilized only Light magic, Black used all _kinds_ of magic, Light, Dark and Ancient. I was not the only one who had noticed; even the Dark Lord was starting to give Black looks of surprise every time he used Dark Magic.

I felt my breathing becoming normal again, so I quickly put another Healing spell on myself and stood up, feeling exhausted, but very much alive. I started towards the nearest Auror and, to my surprise and horror, it turned out to be Potter's mentor — 'Mad-Eye' Moody. As I was weak already, I did not dare use wordless magic, which gave Moody a split second advantage over me. I had to duck and weave around the trees on the edge of the clearing. Moody tripped over a splayed root, and I made my move. I streaked my wand through the air, cut left and shouted, "_Equires Desistus!"_ The spell was designed to give the caster half of an enemy's energy, while making the enemy's limbs temporarily lifeless. But the Auror dodged it by Dissaparating, and Apparated back in the middle of the clearing, shouting, "Every one, to Hidden Grove!" I watched as another Auror grabbed the bound Death Eaters and Dissaparated, while a tough looking brute grabbed Potter and Black roughly (Black and Potter showed every sign of fighting), and Dissaparated. I walked up to the clearing and looked around — total destruction. I found at least nine bodies as I walked around reviving those who could wake up. Out of the nine, three were Aurors and six were Death Eaters.

I looked up at Voldemort after I revived Lucius. From the look in his glowing red eyes, we both could see that he was livid.

"Doesn't look like he's in a good mood anymore," Lucius stated.

"Yeah, I hope I don't have to go through another round of Cruciatus," I muttered.

"Ah, cheer up, Snape. At least you won't be the only one this time!"

"You owe me"

"Why?"

"The bet"

Lucius threw me three galleons and dissaparated.


	6. Chapter 6

The Interrogation

Even though the Death Eaters were tired from the battle, they were marshalling all their strength to survive the _Crucio_ that each one was receiving. I crawled into my position after a brutal wave of the Cruciatus Curse. I looked around, my head throbbing, at the half-dead Death Eater who was experiencing his first _Crucio._ Every single Death Eater was _Crucio'd _before Voldemort stepped into the circle. A silence fell among the Death Eaters, a silence profound it seemed even the world had stopped turning. The wind died down. No nocturnal creatures could be seen or heard. The horrible silence stretched on and on, and Voldemort let us wait for almost three minutes, in silence and tension, before speaking.

"We could have won that battle. It was in our hands. But none of my Death Eaters know how to fight. I watched from afar as each of you was defeated by your opponent. They were not even fully trained Aurors — merely trainees! I watched from afar as you lost the battle in the most humiliating manner possible. I was disappointed as I watched two young trainees bring down my Death Eaters one by one. Finally, I decided that you might need support from your master and that you might draw courage that your master's presence in the battle. However, even that did nothing to enhance your courage; when I entered the battle I saw you falling twice as fast as before. I thought that if I keep those two talented trainees at bay, you might have a chance, but I was wrong. I watched in vain as one by one you fell, losing a battle that should have been ours."

Voldemort started to look around, giving us time to take in what he had just said. After an uncomfortable minute, he started again.

"What was the purpose of going to that godforsaken forest? To capture as many Aurors as possible! How many did we capture? None! On top that, three of you thought it would be funny to get captured, and six went even further and got themselves killed! Failing a mission with your lord at your side is worse than failing because of a simple mistake. Every single one of you has paid for this failure, but I am not yet satisfied. I want two teams to attack two Auror meetings that are taking place tomorrow morning. One is in Diagon Alley in a bar called Three Trinkets. The other is in a Muggle bar called Dragon's Gut. I want the teams to kill everyone at the meetings. Failure will not be accepted."

The Dark Lord turned to Lucius. "Walk with me."

"Yes, Master," Lucius drawled, jumping at the opportunity of getting into Voldemort's good graces again. As they walked away, I looked around at the other Death Eaters, most of whom seemed very worried, probably thinking about what would happen to them if they failed this mission. I caught a sudden movement and looked over at a certain Death Eater who was fidgeting nervously. I watched him carefully as he took out something from his robe, looking at it with worried eyes. I stared at the object and was getting curious to know what it was when the Death Eater turned and was able to see it — a mirror. I would have had to be stupid not to recognize the mirror I'd seen so many times — every detention I had with Potter or with Black, in fact. They had used to communicate when they had separate detentions. To see such an object in the hands of a Death Eater made me instantly suspicious.

The moment Lucius came back from his walk with the Dark Lord, I told him about what I had seen, and was going to point out the culprit, when the Dark Lord dismissed us. I let out a shout of fury as I saw him disappear into thin air. Lucius, ignoring me, got up and said, "Attention! We will attack the Muggle bar tomorrow evening at seven. Anyone who does not wish to join my team can go now." Quite a number of Death Eaters Disapparated and I laughed, seeing Lucius's face.

With those few remaining, Lucius established a meeting time and a rudimentarily strategy for the next morning. "Any questions?" he asked.

But the remaining Death Eaters, too exhausted and dispirited to respond, remained silent.

I was in much the same mood as I finally Disapparated to my hated home.

The plan had been perfect. It was so simple that nothing could have gone wrong, and it didn't. The meeting had been going on for half an hour, and the Aurors were deeply absorbed in the proceedings. It was easy to Apparate in the middle of the bar and kill everybody in sight. In under five minutes we had killed them and identified the bodies. There were only five Aurors among them, and they had been practically torn to shreds by the barrage of curses that had hit them.

We were celebrating our victory, when I saw somebody running towards the bar. We quickly hid behind the bar and waited. The man was wearing black robes — I realized with shock that the man was wearing Death Eaters robes. Lucius seemed to have noticed too, because he began to stand up, but I quickly pulled him down. The man was not wearing a mask, and I was even more shocked when I saw his face —

"Alex Romanov," Lucius muttered.

Then the man was inside the bar, and he let out a howl of rage. "Damn you! Damn you! Damn you! Why did you go early without telling Moody? Why the fuck did you not come to my house as I told you? I knew this was going to happen, I could have stopped this!"

I suddenly realized who had betrayed me before my first mission and who had told Voldemort about the girl who had escaped — Alex Romanov. With a sudden urge to kill the man for all the trouble he had caused me, I stood up, and before the traitor had the chance to mutter a shield spell, shouted "_EXPELLIARMUS!" _He was thrown all the way to the other side of the bar and hit a window ledge with such force that the window shattered. I walked up to him, took him by the arm and dragged him out of the bar, casting the Dark Mark into the evening sky.

I Apparated to the usual meeting place, hoping that Voldemort would be there. I was not disappointed. As I began to walk towards the Dark Lord, dragging the traitor behind me, I heard Lucius Apparate behind me with the rest of the team. I kissed the Dark Lord's robes, but before I could take my place, Voldemort noticed the prisoner.

"Why are you dragging Romanov, Snape?"

I did not hesitate to tell the story. "Master, I believe that he is the person who told the Ministry my location and warned them of the attack on the Muggle house. He also tried to warn the Aurors in Diagon Alley about the attack today."

"Romanov, a traitor?" Voldemort's eyes were full of fury as he said, "_Enervate!"_ pointing at the unconscious body of Romanov. The moment he woke up, he looked around, and when he saw that he was caught, he muttered something. Before he could finish the decimating curse, I silenced him. Voldemort looked at me, and before he could tell me what he wanted, I brought out the potion he needed — Veritaserum. I put three measured drops into the mouth of the struggling man. Immediately his eyes went out of focus, and his chin fell onto his chest. Voldemort did not waste any time. He immediately bent over the traitor and began interrogating him.

"Who do you work for?" he demanded.

"Dumbledore," came the emotionless reply.

"What do you report to him?"

"Everything about the Death Eater meetings and future targets."

"Did you tell him about the attack on the trainee Aurors in Drakken Forest?"

"No, didn't have time."

"Did you tell them the location of Snape's house?"

"Yes, I wanted to get back at him for killing my cousin. I couldn't tell the Ministry in person, of course. They would have arrested me on the spot, but I sent them a nice detailed letter explaining how to get past Snape's wards.

"What do you know about the Order of the Phoenix?"

"Just that it really does exist. Dumbledore never let me join. He did not trust me enough."

"Good thing he didn't," I thought, considering the ease with which we were extracting information from this sorry excuse for a spy.

"Tell me about yourself."

"I am Alex Romanov. I joined the Dark Lord when I believed he was after all the Muggleborns. When I learned his real plan, to take over the world, I turned traitor, feeding information to Dumbledore and the Order. I have been waiting for my chance to kill Severus Snape ever since."

"What did you do after last night?"

"I immediately went home after my failed attempt to contact the Aurors through my two-way mirror. I gave a fire call to Moody, told him everything, and told him to tell Dumbledore about this new attack. The ten Aurors who were supposed to go to Diagon Alley went instead to some untold location, but the other five, who were supposed to attack the meeting held in the graveyard today, did not listen and did not come to meet me. They were supposed to come to me, but they didn't and they were killed. Now their blood is on my hands, and I will never get my revenge on Snape…"

Voldemort stood up and gave a look of pure hatred to the stunned traitor. He then looked up at me and said, "You have done well, Severus. You shall have the pleasure of watching him die." He turned to Lucius and touched his Dark Mark. I bit my lip in as the Mark turned pitch black. I turned around to hear the other Death Eaters arrive and take their place in the circle.

"Welcome, Death Eaters. We have among us a special guest tonight, who will have the pleasure of being tortured by you. I will leave you to it!" said the Dark Lord and vanished.

Bellatrix was the first person to step forward and cast a curse. "_Crucio!_" The man screamed, even though he was under Veritaserum. The other Death Eaters joined her, taking turns cursing him. I joined in too. After all, he had intended to kill me. _"Crucio!" "Sipio!" "Crucio!" "Expungio!" "Incendio!" "Sectumsempra!" "Crucio!" "Crucio!" "Evabaro!" "Vibratos!" _It went on and on, never ending. Soon the traitor's appearance could not be called human. His legs were broken, and the bones were sticking out from the flesh. His arms were bent at weird angles, also broken. He was reduced to a shapeless, disgusting piece of flesh and bones lying in a pool of his own blood. I knew he would not hold out much longer, and Bellatrix knew it too. She turned to me. "Would you like to do the honors, Snape?"

"I'd love to, Bella," I pointed my wand at the traitor — and I lowered it. The others were staring at me.

"Let's leave him here to die. Why should we give him such an easy death after what he did to the Dark Lord?"

There were many whispered agreements, but in the end we Disapparated, leaving Romanov to die slowly, painfully in the deserted graveyard.


	7. Chapter 7

The Inner-Circle

The next morning Lucius fire called me to invite me to a party at Malfoy Manor. I tried to refuse, but he said it was to celebrate something important, and I had to accept. I spent the interim gathering ingredients the second potion the Dark Lord has requested, but all too soon had to set the project aside to leave for the party. I Apparated to Wiltshire Street, walked in the direction of Lucius's house and knocked on the ostentatious twelve foot tall gate with wrought iron serpents entwined in the center. The gate opened slowly by itself, I walked up the grass path leading to the manor.

The moment I entered the manor, my jaw dropped. This was not what I had expected, a gathering of the richest people of the wizarding world, but a meeting of all those in the Dark Lord's inner circle. When Lucius had said that it was an important party, he had meant it. I stopped staring and stepped forward into the room. I walked over to Lucius, who was sitting on a comfortable chair before a boardroom table. He looked up as I came towards him and smirked, "Not what you expected?"

"Why didn't tell you me that the _party_ was a meeting of the inner circle?"

"I wouldn't have been a surprise then, would it?"

Just then, Voldemort entered from an adjoining room and everyone rose. As he took his seat, he gave me a look that said many things, but most importantly of all it said, _You did well_.

"As you can see, we have a new member this evening, and he really does deserve this honor. As you already know, Severus here identified and captured the spy who has been giving the Order of the Phoenix inside information about us. The Order had been planning to attack our meeting in the graveyard yesterday, but they never got the chance thanks, again, to Severus."

"Thank you, master," was I all I could manage to say.

"We hereby invite you to join the inner circle of the Death Eaters. Do you accept?"

"Yes."

"I watched you as you fought your way up through the Death Eater ranks. I have seen that you give everything you have to finish every mission you have been given, just as every Death Eater under my command is expected to do. I liked you from the start, your ambition, and how you led your men, but what made you really stand out, was your Slytherin qualities: ambition, cunning…hatred." He looked around and spoke to everyone in general.

"I want all of you to be ruthless now, to kill anyone and everyone that opposes you. Now we are in open war against both the magical and Muggle worlds. We must not give up, and every mission from now on is crucial to our success. My friends, we are closer than ever to winning this war, and we will not be discouraged by Dumbledore and his Order of the Phoenix."

A cheer went up in the crowd, and I joined in. I had never dreamed to see the Dark Lord as amiable and intimate with his followers as he was with those of the inner circle.

After the Dark Lord departed, the Death Eaters began to disperse, stopping to great me as they left. Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Rabastan, Rookwood, Crouch (I couldn't believe that a man in position to become the next Minister of Magic had a Death Eater son), Avery, Macnair, Dolohov, Neiil and Quadling. If I ever had to repeat that list of names in the future, I thought, smiling to myself, I would have to add one more name — Severus Snape.

----

_Three months later, in a remote Muggle village._

"Come on, Snape, whip the boy raw!"

I drew my wand back without hesitating and swung it as if brandishing a whip. The small Muggle boy flew two feet into the air and landed in a puddle of his own mother's blood, curling into a protective ball and crying. His father shouted, "What kind of fucking coward are you to hit an innocent child? How do you kill a defenseless woman, you fucking bastard? Don't you have a fucking conscious? I gave him a cold look and spat in his face. "No. I'm a Death Eater," I replied, and killed the man in cold blood. I practiced whipping technique on the boy until he died three hours from shock and pain.

----

_Six months later on the outskirts of Hogsmead._

The sobbing child was spread eagle on the floor, tied by invisible ropes. I had wanted to cause as much pain as possible, but seeing the silent tears was too much even for me to take. I could only put three curses on him before I had to kill him painlessly while the others were not watching. That night I had a nightmare about all those I had killed coming after me to take revenge. They'd ripped me to pieces.

----

_Two months later._

It had gone on for months - the nightmares. First I had ignored them, telling myself that they couldn't hurt me, but every time I killed, one more face joined the others as they come after me night after night. They were turning into a veritable horde — the victims of Severus Snape.

----

_One day later._

After I had joined the inner circle, I had killed just like Lucius killed, for sport and for pleasure. I had killed to get the praise of the Dark Lord, and that is exactly what I got. I gained more powers, and I used them on my hunts and raids. Rare were the times when we did not complete a mission.

However, those days were over. I could now barely speak any of the Unforgivables. Every time I was commanded to kill or to torture, I couldn't do it, and arranged for others to do it, or if pressed, killed my victims as fast and painlessly as possible. The Dark Lord had been very happy when the two potions I brewed for him were completed, and he praised me even more, giving me more responsibility than any other, and teaching me more than anyone else. Nevertheless, it was still hard for my to kill, and it did not take long for everyone to notice my reluctance. I knew I was in danger of loosing everything I'd fought so hard to achieve, and I forced myself to start killing again.

----

_A few weeks later in a Muggle city._

The woman was screaming as she watched her daughter being tortured right before her eyes. I watched in utter helplessness as the Death Eaters put curse upon curse on the naked teen lying on the blood-smattered road. She died when they cut her throat; her mother was half-dead by the time it happened. It was my job to kill the mother, and I had to—reluctantly—torture her, mercilessly, under Bellatrix's watchful eyes. By the end of that day, we had destroyed a city and wiped out its entire population.

----

_Dijon, France, a Muggle city. One month later._

The Dark Lord's ultimate goal was finally becoming clear to the public — world domination. We were ordered to attack Dijon, and attack it we did. The city, once beautiful, lay in ruins when the Death Eaters left it. France joined in the hunt for Voldemort, and Russia, Germany and Poland soon followed.

That day I saw a girl and I was unfortunate enough to be the one to kill her. The girl had fiery red hair and bluish green eyes, which reminded me of Lily's. I would have been unable to harm her, but the memory of Lily, pregnant by Potter, gave me enough anger to fuel my curses. More than enough. When I left that girl, she did not resemble anything, only a smoking pile of ash and bones.

That night I had another dream, in which the girl was Lily, and I was going to kill her, but Lily suddenly snatched my wand and cut my throat. I watched myself die slowly.

----

_Bulgaria, three weeks later._

I killed a pregnant woman with red hair. I had not meant to. I'd aimed the curse at a Muggle law enforcement officer, but he jumped aside, and she got the curse full in the chest. I was staring down at her in stunned shock, when the Bulgarian Aurors called Rhömâtulà (which meant, Red Dragons) struck, far faster and more deadly than our British Aurors. We were sorely outnumbered and forced to flee. Lucius had to grab me and Apparate, for I just stood there looking at the pregnant woman lying dead at my feet.

That night changed my life.

----

_One week later. Spinners End._

I could not look at my own face. I destroyed every mirror in my house, afraid of what I might see if I looked in the mirror.

One day after a long, fierce battle with the Aurors, I came back home, tired to the core, only to see a full-length mirror in my hallway — a present from Lucius, as I later found out. I stared numbly at my reflection, refusing to accept what I saw in front of me. The face, twisted from all the evil it had seen and done, was barely human. The hands were claws, scarred from all the lives they had been taken, blackened by the curses they had cast, and twisted from all the potions made, not to help, but to hurt. But they eyes were the worst, deep in their dark sockets, they looked back at me, the eyes of a murderer, a torturer, a killer, dead and utterly evil.

In my heart, I knew that mine was a debt too great for hope of repayment. _There is no way to amend for destroying a life, _I repeated to myself. _The dead do not value your remorse_

Behind my reflection, I saw all the poor souls whom I'd killed, dripping with blood, yet strong enough to point their bloody fingers at their murderer, nodding their heads as if agreeing on some unanimous decision.

I retreated and felt my back hit the wall, and before I could stop myself, I pointed my wand at the mirror and thought, "_Diffindo_." The mirror imploded and then exploded, sending glass and wood everywhere like shrapnel. I was too overcome with grief and shock to even block the incoming glass as it hit me full force. I covered my face, but the faces of the dead swept in front of my eyes. The faces of my victims, the pleading eyes, their hoarse voices begging for mercy ... All these things accosted me each time I looked into my own eyes. I lowered my hands and looked at them; they were covered in blood. My blood looked no different than the blood a Muggle or a Mudblood shed when I killed them, but still I called myself superior. It was laughable. I was a half-blood; the blood of a Muggle polluted mine, yet I chosen to forget it. Even Muggleborns were superior to me. They were innocent, while I had no honor, no decency left in me. This was not what I had wanted when I received my Dark Mark. I had hoped for gratification, pleasure, and fulfillment.Yet here I was, unable to look myself in the eye. Joining the inner circle brought me no power. As I sat there on the glass-covered floor, bleeding and mourning, I realized that it was my twenty first birthday.

----

_Scotland, dark cave._

The inner circle met once again to discuss some important mission. I did not listen to most of it, but when Hogwarts, I had to listen.

"We must breach the Order of the Phoenix, and according to the rumors, you have to be a friend of Dumbledore or trusted by him to join it. The only person who has qualification to be a teacher in the inner circle is Severus,"

"Me? …uh…Thank you, My Lord." I was shocked. I had no idea how I was supposed to go to Dumbledore and get a job. I told this to Lucius.

"What should I do, turn in an application. When I'm sure he'll kill me on the spot?"

"You'll come up with something, Severus. You always do."

"Like follow him around the world?" I sneered.

"I suppose that would be a start," was all Lucius said before he Dissaparated to his comfortable Manor.

I walked round and round, trying to come up with a plan to get into Hogwarts, but came up with nothing better than trying to follow Albus Dumbledore.


	8. Chapter 8

The Prophecy

The next meeting with Lucius had been a fiasco. I had come to Lucius's manor expecting some report on Dumbledore's whereabouts, but instead received orders to kill the Death Eater who had just been captured. I left, angry with Voldemort and Lucius for making me do things that _anyone_ could do. Therefore, it was that I had one last mission before approaching Dumbledore and trying to get a job. My intended victim was safely ensconced in St Mungo's, so I took Polyjuice containing the hairs of Crouch Jr.

I Apparated right in front of the ugly mannequin and stepped through the glass, feeling a cold touch up my spine. The line was short, and the blonde receptionist was soon greeting me.

"Hello, Mr. Crouch, what brings you here?"

I smiled. "I'm here to see the captured Death Eater. Where is he?"

"Spell damage, fourth floor, third door to the left." It seemed that she was trying to catch my eye so I quickly started towards the stairs. As I came to the third floor, checked that no Aurors were about who might impede my escape, if something went wrong. I finally reached the fourth floor, and was walking to the third door when I saw Lily with a Healer inspecting the Death Eater lying bandaged on the bed. Lily was speaking.

"He's in a coma; he really got a beating this one. Keep me abreast of how he's doing, and when he wakes up, I want you to call me immediately." The Healer left the room, nodding at me as he passed. I stepped into the room.

"Crouch, what are you doing here?" said Lily, surprised.

"Oh, I came here to see the Death Eater."

"Really, Coursy is a dangerous prisoner, not a freak-show attraction," she said in a no-nonsense tone, taking me by the arm. "Have you seen enough?"

She did not know who I really was so I could tell what I had wanted to tell ever since I saw her pregnant. With no Black or Potter to intervene, I could. say it.

"Oh yes, congratulations on your baby by the way, I hope it's a boy"

"Ah…T- thanks."

With a jolt, I realized that it have seemed odd to receive congratulations from a sixteen year old boy. Lily was starting to stare at me suspiciously, so just as she took out her wand to secure the straps on the Death Eater, I quietly took out the potion, retreated from the room, threw it in, and closed the door. I waited for a few seconds and then entered the room just as Lily started to fall; I ran up to her, took her in my arms, and put her gently on the floor.

"I'm sorry, but I had to do that on order to finish my mission," I muttered to her unconscious body.

I walked up to the Death Eater, tilted back his head, and then slowly poured the poison into his mouth. The Dark Lord had specifically said that he must die slowly, but I did not want to do that as they might get some answers out of him or might find an antidote

I left the building, making sure that no one saw me modifying the memory of the blonde witch. They would find the body soon enough when Lily woke up. The Healer will would probably think that Crouch Jr. did it, but no one would be able to prove it as he was in that moment under his father's watchful gaze.

----

I was at home the next day making a complicated potion when the _Daily Prophet _arrived bearing a headline, which caught my attention. I gave the owl a Knut and stared at the front page.

DAILY PROPHET

MURDER AT ST. MUNGOS

_By special correspondent Bill Stimpson_

A captured Death Eater, who was badly injured during a battle between trainee Aurors and a band of Death Eaters working for You-Know-Who late last year, has been killed in his bed at St Mungo's. Lily Potter, a well known Unspeakable, was at the scene when the murder took place.

The Death Eater was an excellent potential source of information for the Ministry, and was believed to be in You-Know-Who's inner circle. Potter, whose memory was erased, is able to recall little of what occurred. In her report, she says:

"I was talking to a person, but I can't remember who. I turned to make sure that the Death Eater was securely strapped down, and I heard him leaving the room. He threw something in, a potion of some sort, which exploded, and… I can't remember anything else."

The Department of Magical Law Enforcement had this to say:

"We believe that You-Know-Who did not want us to learn anything important from the captured Death Eater," says Amelia Bones of the Ministry. "We suspect Polijuice was involved."

There are rumors that Bartemius Crouch was spotted in the hospital during the time of the murder, but Crouch Sr. provided proof that his son was with him during that time. (Where will they strike next? Page 12-20. When will the war end? Page 22-25)

I read it and then threw it into the fire, watching it blacken.

----

I Apparated into Hogsmead and was taking a stroll towards the Three Broomsticks to catch what people were saying about the St Mungo's Murder, when I saw Dumbledore stroll by. I quickly changed my plans and decided to take this chance to observe the target of my next mission. I hid behind a large barrel and swiftly put on my hood; making sure my face was in darkness, I walked out from behind the barrel and followed Dumbledore. He walked into a dirty looking bar called the Hogs Head, bending down to enter through the short door. I followed suit.

I entered just as he said to the barman, "She's here, isn't she? I hope she has the same talent as her great-great-grandmother, because if she doesn't, I'll have to drop the subject." The barman gave him a wink.

I was interested. Dumbledore had a job opening, and I really wanted one. Just as the barman went into the kitchen, I went upstairs and found the room into which Dumbledore had gone. I pressed my ear to the door. A woman was speaking.

"Yes, I am the great-great granddaughter of Cassandra Trelawaney."

"Ah, wonderful, wonderful! Will I be lucky enough to hear an actual prediction?"

"Um— My inner eye does not see anything—wait! Someone will interfere with your business today; you will have to make a choice."

"Thank you for your time," said Dumbledore, polite, but unimpressed. "I'll contact you after I have made my decision."

Suddenly, the woman spoke in a deep, loud voice.

"_THE ONE WITH THE POWER TO VANQUISH THE DARK LORD APPROACHES…BORN TO THOSE WHO HAVE THRICE DEFIED HIM, BORN AS THE SEVENTH MONTH DIES... THE DARK LORD WILL MARK HIM AS HIS EQUAL—"_

So intent was I on what was going on in the room, I did not hear the barman approach until he had grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled me from the door towards another room. I had escaped his grip and run towards the stairs, when he tackled me, causing me to fall and hit my head hard on the dirty floor. Then he yanked my up by the hood and took me into the room where the Seer had finished the prophecy and Dumbledore was talking to her. The barman explained where he had found me and what I'd been doing. Dumbledore looked at me in surprised, and the usual senile twinkle in his eyes was replaced with something serious and dangerous. "How much did you hear?" he asked in a commanding voice.

"T-the fir-s, first bit," I stammered, prepared for the Killing Curse. Instead, Dumbledore motioned for the barman to take me downstairs, where the thug threw me bodily from the pub. No sooner was I out, than I Disapparated to my master's side.

Voldemort looked livid as I approached his 'throne' as we call it. I kissed his robes and waited in silence to be allowed to stand. I had only to wait a moment.

As I stood up, I saw him giving me a calculated look. Without waiting to be told what to tell, I started my story.

"Master, I followed Dumbledore as you commanded me. He went to a bar in Hogsmead today, and I followed. There I came to hear a prophecy about you, my Lord." I said this so fast that by the time I had finished, Voldemort had barely raised his wand to curse the daylights out of me for ruining my chances with Dumbledore.

"What did you say?"

"I heard a prophecy about you, my Lord."

"Look me in the eye!" Voldemort commanded. I knew he was using Legilimency to make sure I was telling the truth. Then after a minute, he said, "What did it say?"

"I did not hear the whole prophecy," I told him, and repeated word for word what Cassandra Twelawney's great-great granddaughter had said.

"You have done well to tell me this, Severus. W have to find who this boy is before he grows up. We will eliminate him _before _he becomes a threat. Well done, Severus, well done!"


End file.
